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Also it is important to put the happiness of the children rather
carefully in its place, which is really not a front place. The unsympathetic, selfish,
hard people who regard happiness as a very exceptional indulgence to which children are by
no means entitled, though they may be allowed a very little of it on their birthdays or at
Christmas, are sometimes better parents in effect than those who imagine that children are
as capable of happiness as adults. Adults habitually exaggerate their own capacity in that
direction grossly; yet most adults can stand an allowance of happiness that would be quite
thrown away on children. The secret of being miserable is to have leisure to bother about
whether you are happy or not. The cure for it is occupation, because occupation means
pre-occupation; and the pre-occupied person is neither happy nor unhappy, but simply alive
and active, which is pleasanter than any happiness until you are tired of it. That is why
it is necessary to happiness that one should be tired. Music after dinner is pleasant:
music before breakfast is so unpleasant as to be clearly unnatural. To people who are not
overworked holidays are a nuisance. To people who are, and who can afford them, they are a
troublesome necessity. A perpetual holiday is a good working definition of hell. |
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